Musings on Wise Hope
At the start of the Bay Area’s shelter in place order, I had a daily schedule. I met with my writing community on Slack every morning, put lots of literary Zoom events in my calendar, baked muffins and chocolate chip cookies, attended morning meditation with my Sangha...
Grief and Gratitude in a Pandemic Year
It’s April 6 again, a day to celebrate and to mourn. My oldest daughter Maya died on this day twenty-eight years ago. As the Covid-19 pandemic rages around the globe, millions of us find our lives radically upended; we’re scared, and we’re grieving. For those of us...
Love and Marriage after 65
Facebook recently reminded me that my newly minted husband and I have been “friends” for seven years. It made me laugh. I think of him as my best friend – yet you couldn’t find two more opposite personalities. How on earth did this happen? No technology glitch or...
Hey Cancer!
In the 22 days from my diagnosis to my surgery, cancer scared the bejesus out of me. I don’t feel especially hostile toward it. I’m more surprised than anything – and, at times even grateful for the wake-up call. On December 17 I was diagnosed with a rare form of...
The Writing Life
My process as a writer is messy. It’s made of equal parts exhilaration and despair, moments of wanting to chuck it all, followed by renewed determination. I’ve been in a Dosi-do for the last four months as I plow through revisions of my 282-page novel interspersed...
One Planet, One People
Mass killings are happening at such an alarming rate that most of us can’t even remember when – or why – the most recent killing spree filled our Twitter feeds or our TV screens. Grieving faces, flowers and candles left on street corners, and empty rhetoric about...
Celebrating Maya
“Don’t worry about anything – or anyone,” my grandmother said, and thumped her cane emphatically, underlining her words. She was speaking from the “other side,” a world where I could not hear her directly, but a gifted psychic could translate her words to me. I don’t...
2018: A Reprise
“Okay, then, 2018.” Those are the words Alex Poulsen and I had engraved on our wedding bands, now stashed in a dresser drawer awaiting our marriage. Alex bought the rings on the Friday before Earth Day, and in backwards fashion proposed on April 22. When 2018 dawned,...
Party Culture
Maya began drinking young - she was binge drinking by the age of 15 at weekend house parties in Walnut Creek. I was a young, naive, overstretched single mom with no concept of the party culture in the wealthy suburbs of Contra Costa County where we lived in the late...
Remembering Maya
On this day 46 years ago I gave birth to a baby girl. We named her Maya. She arrived three weeks early so she was was tiny, just 5 lbs. 4 oz. For the rest of her life, Maya was in a hurry. Friends called her "Barbie" because of her white-blonde hair. She had dark...
